The Old, Married lady speaks: That'll never be me

One cool thing about being the old, married lady in a young, single city is that you can observe first dates without having to go on them. Case in point, the couple sitting next to me at the coffee shop a few days ago. My husband and I decided to venture out to our new neighborhood, grab ourselves something to drink and collectively share the free Internet that we get when we purchase something. So we headed to Cafe 976, a PB coffee house (quite literally in a house) that provides good food, even better Yerba Mate Lattes and that "sit and visit vibe" that is just great for those first dates where people insist on "meeting for coffee."

It was quite a crowded day, what with the students hoarding every table, their books spread around them, computers on You Tube. After a quick scan of the place it was obvious we'd have to sit outside (despite the overcast day) so I took my sleeping baby and claimed a table next to a cute little couple who were quite obviously on their first date.

It's the little things, like the awkward silences followed by the long stories or one liner after one liner. It's the awkward way of avoiding contact, how there is a polite answer for everything, or even how one person (in this case the girl, but I'm sure in some universe it could be switched) has to act very, very interested in what the other person is saying (in this case, he had the perfect movie, the movie better than all movies, the movie that should already have been made but for some reason it hasn't been made yet! What kind of craziness is that?! So he's going to make that movie and that movie is going to be the best movie ever made).

I sat quietly and played around with the computer, all the while rocking a sleeping baby and waiting for my husband and my drink. The date went on, what with the guy going on and on about his movie and the girl practicing her very best "mmm-hmmm" or "you don't say." And suddenly it al became so clear.

I remember dating (it's not like it was SOOO long ago) and I remember the nervous habit of talking and talking trying to keep things going, but really, nothing was being said. They weren't connecting on any level really, not finding out things about each other, not even really looking in to each others eyes. And really, when it came down to it, meeting my husband was effortless, the first date was effortless, and we really talked, from the very start.

The guy went on about how he was sitting on the idea for the best movie ever made and then added that he would probably never make it, because, philosophically speaking, it would be so unfair to the public, because if you make the best movie ever made and then people spend their lives watching that movie, well then they just aren't living, they are just watching a movie... and who wants to be responsible for that?

Ahh young kids these days and their genius ideas.

When my husband finally showed up with my drink I instantly asked him if he could run back inside and get me a lid for it as well as a spoon for the whip cream, he smiled and asked me if I needed anything else. Then he went back to get me what I asked for.

And then the guy next to me leaned over to his date and whispered "that will never be me."

With the right girl... you never know. You might want to wait on her hand and foot and she might want to watch your genius movie.

Some call it love...